The Gentleman and the Valkyrie
by NightcatMau
Summary: Springheeled Jack has wandered in from the wild and takes Valkyrie as his partner. But what kind of partner will the terror of London Town be? This is an older story and it has extremely faint traces of Jackkyrie (Jackyrie?) but some Valduggery too. Yes, a repost by reader request. COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I don't own Springheeled Jack, Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Ghastly, or Erksine. Hopefully this becomes a good long story for old Jack, and of course Jackyrie ahead! Valkyrie is about 40 here, story is in her POV.

* * *

I made my way into the Sanctuary with a heavy heart. Skulduggery and I were no longer partners, and I'd been working alone for months, but it was clear I needed a partner by my side, and so did he. Today we were both to meet our new partners. Goody.

My steps drug as I made my way to Erksine's office, and I was seriously thinking of turning tail and running. Running from the Sanctuary, running from being a detective, running from everything. I wasn't sure I could face Skulduggery, could bear seeing him with another partner. But I knew I needed to go on. I couldn't walk away from magic, I couldn't walk away form being a detective either. I liked my job and I was good at it. The best the Sanctuary had. I'd turned down being the Prime Detective three times already. I couldn't think of a job I'd be less suited to, to be honest.

I opened the door and entered Erksine's office. Skulduggery was there, with Ghastly and it was clear the two men were now partners. Skulduggery ignored me, but Ghastly gave me a friendly nod. But it was my new partner that captured by attention, because it was _him_.

I looked him up in down, well aware my mouth was open in wonder, yet unable to find the manners to close it. From his tattered black suit, to his battered top hat, it was the one man who had captured my imagination from the moment I'd first saw him.

I walked forward, unable to repress the huge grin on my face, and he smiled a terrible smile in return, his small eyes locked on me. He held out his arms in a friendly gesture, one I knew he didn't expect me to take, but I did anyways, minding his sharp-nailed hands. I drew my new partner into a massive hug, enjoying the scent of him. Wild, like he was, but also the city was on him too. Dublin now, I guessed, and I knew he ruled the rooftops there.

"Jack!" I said happily, squeezing him tighter. "You''re my new partner? I got an upgrade!" Jack laughed, hugging me back. It was true we'd fought on occasion, but there was always a fondness deep underneath and I could tell that in his own way Jack has missed me as much as he could miss anyone.

"Hello, poppet. Missed old Jack, did we? Well he's at the Sanctuary now, all good and ready to be a proper copper. Sorry, I mean detective."

He drew back and we grinned at one another. Jack's teeth may have been small and yellow, but I knew they were razor sharp. I didn't know if he would bite, but I didn't fancy ever finding out. Jack was being Jack, after all. Which meant the smile was meant to be friendly, but to show me clear menace as well. Jack was a wild man, and I had no illusions that joining the Sanctuary would change him. I wasn't even sure why he had wandered in from the wild or how long he would stay. But I knew I was enchanted with him, and it took Erskine clearing his throat to drag my gaze away from Jack at long last.

"Right, then. You have your partners and the first assignment is to spend two weeks with your new partner, and I mean all day, every day. If you can stand one another when there is nothing in particular to do, you'll make good partners. Now scat, I had Tipstaff to torment."

We left, Jack opening the door for me, and touching the brim of his battered top hat.

"Thank you kindly, Jack." I said, and gave him a smile. Jack straightened up in pride, and I realized he wasn't used to having a woman thank him for anything. Our partnership was going to be interesting.

* * *

We were walking out of the Sanctuary, when Jack turned to me. "I like the new nails, love, you look better with them longer."

"Thank you, Jack, but they'll never be as fine as yours. I wish I could get them to grow like that."

Jack beamed, and held out a hand for mine. "Let's have a look, then." He was gentle as he took my hand, pressing on the nails, testing them for sharpness. The were indeed sharp, but not strong. He looked at me, frowning slightly. "Been eating enough fish and chips, poppet? It will give you the strongest nails this side of London."

"But I'll be as big as a house if I eat that all the time, Jack."

"Who said it has to be fried, love? You let old Jack teach you what he knows, I won't steer you wrong." He held out his arm and I took it. Jack had lovely manners when he felt like it. I steered him to my car, a white 1950 Chevy Sedan Convertible, but Jack shook his head.

"Sorry, love, nothing against you, mind, but I'd rather walk. I can smell there's a proper shop near here. Only a walk of a kilometre of two, and we'll get to know one another better on the way." I blinked at him. He was serious. He looked at me, waiting patiently for an answer. I hated walking that far for anything, but Jack was always on the move, so I considered it the training I'd need to keep up with him.

I nodded and Jack gave me a delighted grin. We walked slowly, Jack admiring the rooftops, pointing out points that would be best to run on, stopping at one point to ask me how I'd get up a two storey building to the roof.

I shrugged. "Displacing the air, and a good jump would do it."

Jack cocked his head. "Suppose you couldn't do that love, leastways not the whole way up. How would would do it then?"

I looked at the building. "From windowsill to windowsill? I honestly don't know, to be truthful, Jack. That's a leap back away from the building and up at the same time. I don't think I'd make it."

"Of course you will, poppet. But let's say we have to sneak around the side, like. He led me around to the side. "Let's see you get up it, then."

"Jack, there's no way I can do this, there are no handholds in the bricks."

"Of course there are, love. Look at the shadows in them, see the deeper ones? That's your handholds. Now up you go, short jumps mind you."

I took a pounce at the wall barely displacing the air and caught hold, surprising myself. I dug in, preparing to spring up to the next handhold, and Jack was beside me. "That's right, get those legs under you, get ready, press down further, it's going to be a big leap, your first one. Now do what you did, and go."

I leapt, and he was beside me, effortless and graceful. I just barely managed to land, and my body was trembling with the effort to stay on the wall. Jack noticed, and made a gesture with his head for me to leap the rest of the way up like I usually did.

We landed on the roof, Jack nodding at me thoughtfully. "Not bad, not bad at all. Jack will have to teach you until it is easier, but a good leap all the same. You need this, Valkyrie, if anyone ever comes after me. The kinds of people who hunt Jack can dampen your powers."

I looked at him in surprise. "But you work for the Sanctuary now, Jack. They just can't hunt you like a wild animal."

"You think that, do you? You think anyone would step in to protect old Jack?"

"I would. You're my partner now, Jack, and nobody is touching you when I'm around."

Jack bounced slightly on his heels. "Can't say as I've even been told that before, but your a right proper lady, you are. What should I call you? Is Valkyrie fine? Or do you prefer something else, poppet?"

"Anything is fine, Jack. I like you, after all."

He grinned and stood up proudly. "That's because Jack is a good friend, he is. Providing you're wanting to be friends with him, that is."

I grinned hugely at him. Jack could be proud and cocksure one moment, and charmingly uncertain the next. He liked being confident, acting the proper gentleman who had the eye of every woman, but he also was terribly shy. Women didn't like Jack, and that was putting it mildly. Most called him ugly, a monster, and they weren't speaking about him as a killer. Jack's grin was far too wide, and his small eyes could blaze like lamps. His head was distorted, something he could partially hide with his battered and much-beloved top hat.

Jack had wild hair, black, often jutting out at angles, looking greasy, though to his credit the man was as clean as a cat. He had his wild smell, something I found attractive, but other people drew away from. His face was a good face, a handsome face if you knew him, but women often screamed at the sight of him all the same. His features were unusual, beautiful and exotic to me, but repellant to others. I looked down, noticing he was wearing boots for the first time. Black with thick heavy soles and heels. They had to way several kilograms at least, but he seemed suited to them. "Jack, those are lovely!"

He grinned. "You like them, poppet? I figured I better dress like a proper gent now that I'm out and about in the daylight."

"I love them! They aren't bothering you?"

"No, that Ghastly bloke made 'em for me, wouldn't take no payment either, even though Jack has plenty of money. Well, to lunch then. We've got a walk ahead of us."

He didn't say long walk, and I knew as we jumped down to him it wasn't. Jack could run endlessly if he chose to, leaping and cartwheeling, alive with the freedom he so enjoyed. He landed more softly that a cat ever could, watching me land with a critical eye. "That's it, poppet. I think that Ghastly bloke is making you a new pair of boots with some proper spring in them. You'll land better in them." He proffered his arm again and I took it. We walked the rest of the walk slowly, and in silence, just enjoying one another's company.

* * *

Jack insisted he buy lunch, and I let him, although I was worried if he had any money. He never bought new clothes that I could see, but I trusted him when he told me he was, as he put it with a grin, well-heeled. We sat at one of the outdoors tables, Jack putting my food before me first. It was a thoughtful gesture and I smiled my appreciation at him. "Thank you, Jack, but I don't want you going broke providing for me."

Jack waved a sharp-nailed hand carelessly. "I've got plenty of money, me. Don't you worry none, poppet. Plus we are getting paid to be here."

"True." I grinned at him happily. We ate chatting, and I restrained myself from bolting down my food. I was starved, but Jack was showing proper manners so I resolved to do the same. He got up twice to bring back more food, and I couldn't believe how much we were eating. Perhaps it was the salt air, the newest Sanctuary being rather close to the sea. Or maybe it was being with someone we liked. At last we were finished, and Jack smiled at me.

"I like seeing a lady who will eat proper like, and enjoy herself too. That skeleton you worked with told me you ate like a wild animal."

"He rarely fed me, Jack. I was lucky to get one or two good meals out of him a day, to be honest. But I know you like to eat, and often, so I assume we'll be stopping more often. " I didn't add that I'd heard he liked eating people best, that would have been rude, even if it was true, which I doubted. Jack was a good man, even if he did kill people. But I killed people, everyone at the Sanctuary did at times. I saw Jack as no different. He was just more of a hunter, liking to choose his prey out of the herds as he referred to crowds. He'd told me he'd come into the Sanctuary because he liked the idea of being able to do it legally, and I just smiled.

* * *

We spent all day together, and I was reluctant to part ways that night, but I knew we had to. Jack touched the brim of his top hat to me and was gone in one mighty bound. I had no idea where he had to go to, and wished I'd known him well enough to invite him back to Gordon's mansion. He'd insisted on escorting me back to the car and I realized he was running and leaping over the rooftops, following me as I drove. He kept pace, running at speeds and making leaps no ordinary man could match. But he was an Adept and they were marvels among men.

I pulled into the mansion driveway, and he hit the ground beside the car, then leapt up to the roof in the same smooth movement. He touched his brim to me from there briefly and I waved back. He'd come home to guard me, I realized, and I found it sweetly touching. "Would you like to come in, Jack? It will be warmer." I called up to his outline.

Jack shook his head. "No, love. I prefer sleeping outside, me. Though if you have a blanket to spare, old Jack would thank you kindly for it." I nodded and went inside, retrieving a blanket. I started to see Jack crouched down on the nearest windowsill, but opened the window to hand the blanket out to him.

Jack nodded his appreciation, then leapt straight up, disappearing from sight. I smiled to myself. This partnership was going to be a lot of fun.

* * *

I got up early the next morning, excited to get dressed and start the day. I opened up the bedroom window and called up to Jack. "Morning, Jack. If you're up yet, I'll make you breakfast."

Jack leaned over the roof edge to grin down at me. "Mornin', love. I got us breakfast, if you're hungry."

"Come down, then." I offered.

"Come up, then." Jack said, laughing as he pulled back from view. I took him at his word, leaning out the window, getting my feet to either side of the sill, then pushing up and out against the air, leaping up to the rooftop.

Jack grinned at me in greeting, gesturing for me to sit. I managed to find my balance and settle in beside him, and he handed over a small sack of take away as well as a coffee. "Thank you, Jack."

He waved a sharp-nailed hand, showing me it meant nothing, but I knew it did. Jack wasn't known for repeated friendliness, though that had a lot to do with the fact that a lot of people weren't friendly to him. Or that if they were, it turned out he couldn't trust them. I knew only time would show him he could trust me, that I was his friend.

I looked out, enjoying the view as I ate, wondering what to say. Jack stated the conversation for me. "Ghastly called. Says he wants us in his shop today. He's got a new suit for me, and proper boots for you. I don't see how you don't trip in those things, they're so worn."

I smiled at him. "I'm not up on roofs too often, but you're right, my feet slide up here. But I just hadn't got around to replacing them because I didn't know if I wanted to go on at the Sanctuary."

Jack looked surprised and cocked his head at me curiously. "Now why would you want to do that, love? It isn't like you to just give up. I knew that when you were fighting that nasty bloke on the beach all by yourself. Wasn't cricket of him, taking you on like that." Jack frowned and I realized he liked me as a friend. As a killer and fighter he didn't mind having the advantage in the least.

"Skulduggery didn't want to be partners anymore."

Jack's frown deepened. "I thought you were best friends, you two."

"I wanted to be more than friends."

Jack winced, drawing in a hissing breath. He touched his scarred neck. "I know the feeling, love."

I looked at the scar. "I heard you'd been killed. But how-"

Jack shrugged. "Old Jack wouldn't know, love. Only that he came to wondering why. Course if I didn't I wouldn't be here right now, would I?" He grinned at me.

"Then I'd miss your sharp wit and chicanery, Jack, and I would miss them."

His grin grew wider, threatening to swallow his head. "Chicanery will always make you happy." He quoted touching the brim of his hat and I laughed in delight.

"You listen to Marilyn Manson?"

"That song, he's a right handsome gent in that video and I like his hat."

"Mmm, it is a nice hat, but not as nice as yours, Jack."

He grinned. Breakfast was over and he handed me down the roof carefully, giving me the blanket back. I wasn't sure if it was because it was threatening rain, or he didn't plan on staying nearby another night and didn't ask. I managed to get down to the window, then grabbed my keys and met Jack outside. He got in the car, looking at me for permission before bringing up his lanky legs to rest his booted feet on the dashboard. I nodded. I honestly didn't care what people did in my car. It was a machine with four wheels and when it wore out I'd get another.

I started for Ghastly's shop, chatting idly with Jack. If the stares other drivers or pedestrians gave him bothered him, he didn't show it. It made me angry to see such ignorance, and my hands tightened on the steering wheel until my knuckles went white. "Easy, love. Old Jack's got a tougher hide than you think. Those kind of people don't bother me. In the natural order of things I hunt them, don't I?"

I relaxed my hands, laughing. "You know how to live the good life, don't you, Jack? Nothing ever bothers you, does it?"

"It bothered me when that skeleton wouldn't look at you. Cold, that was, and cruel."

"Skulduggery's not exactly known for being a font of loving-kindness. I got what I deserved, Jack, nothing more, nothing less."

Jack shook his head, frowning. "You didn't deserve that, love. He could have been nicer about it. No need to drop you like that. Then again, he gave you to me that way, so maybe old Jack should thank him." Jack grinned, inviting me to smile and forget my worries.

So I did, and we enjoyed the ride together. Neither of us had said the word 'friend' directly yet and I didn't want to rush things. Jack was being a friend as best he knew how, and he was being a decent one at that. He'd watched over me the night before, he'd fed me twice already. He was seeing to it that I could learn what he had to teach and he treated me as an equal. We pulled up to Ghastly's shop and got out. Jack got the door for me, touching the brim of his hat to me. I smiled my thanks, resisting the temptation to touch his shoulder.

I wasn't sure how he would take the gesture, and I didn't was to put him on the spot. Skulduggery was there of course, and he pointedly ignored us. I saw Jack's face contort in anger briefly, but he collected himself to stand between me and Skulduggery, blocking the later from view. I appreciated the gesture. "Thanks." I whispered.

"Think nothing of it, love." He murmured back.

Ghastly of course had far better manners and smiled at us both. "Tea?" He offered, and we nodded. He gestured for us to sit so we did, as far from Skulduggery as possible. I didn't trust myself not to hit the man. Ghastly brought us our tea, and I noticed Jack was rather refined as he drank. He was every inch the gentleman at times, as if he'd lived in the world for a long time before leaving it. I'd heard rumors that he was the original Springheeled Jack, a man who couldn't or wouldn't stay dead and wondered if it were true.

But Ghastly broke into my thoughts. "Jack, Valkyrie. How are you two getting along?"

"Great actually, Ghastly. Jack's been a good friend to me so far."

"Good, good." Ghastly nodded. He turned to Jack. "Valkyrie's treating you all right, Jack?"

Jack nodded, seemingly unable to speak, and I realized calling him a friend was about as stupid as proposing to Skulduggery had been. But to his credit, he found his voice at last, a high-pitched giggle coming forth. "She's been a right proper lady, she has. Hasn't even tried to decapitate me once."

We both started to laugh at that, and Ghastly just smiled, shaking his head. "Good, you two deserve someone who you can stand being with. I'm trusting you both to look out for one another."

"We're fine, Ghastly." I assured him. "Jack kept watch over me last night. He's very protective. Much obliged, by the way, Jack." I said, turning to him. He gave me another of his frightening grins, though it was meant in a kindly fashion. We finished our tea and followed Ghastly into the back room. Ghastly produced Jack's clothes complete with a new top hat, directing him to dress while he escorted me back out with my boots. The boots looked almost exactly like Jack's, and I looked at him questioningly as I changed into them.

"I knew if you took to Jack he'd have you on the rooftops of Dublin, and I don't fancy you up there in anything else. Don't bother cutting your nails, by the way. I know he'll be wanting to teach you to fight with them. Skulduggery said something insulting about me seeing you use them on a Hollow Man once, and Jack's entire face lit up in admiration."

"Wow." Jack came out before Ghastly could reply, and we both fell silent. Jack in new clothes was a sight to behold. Ghastly had used the same material he made my clothes out of, and they suited Jack well. Better than well. He looked dangerous, which he was, but he was also magnetic in the clothes.

Jack grinned at me, touching the brim of his new hat. "Well, what do you think, love?"

"Jack, you look amazing." Jack grinned and walked towards me. His smile changed slightly and I wondered if he was flirting with me. Skulduggery gave a snort and we both looked over. When I looked back at Jack he was frowning, the moment gone. I was sorely tempted to go smack Skulduggery a good one.

We both thanked Ghastly and walked back out to the car. We got in and I looked at Jack. "Where to now?"

He shrugged. "Wherever you like, poppet. Won't be able to teach you proper like until nightfall, so whatever you choose is fine with me."

I turned to look at him. "Jack, how often do people look up?"

"Not often." He admitted.

I got out, and he followed, curious. I looked up at Ghastly's building and the long line of seemingly derelict buildings before and after it. "We'll tell people we're roof jumping, I'd love to see them prove otherwise."

Jack's grin broadened. "Race you to the end and back again then, love? Last one back buys lunch." Jack leapt off then not waiting for a reply, giggling and he started off along the rooftops. I got a running start, then was displacing the air and racing him along the rooftops. We ran, jumping from rooftop to rooftop, chasing one another forwards and back for almost and hour. At last we sat down, both of us winded. "Cor, you can run, poppet. Told you the boots would help."

"That you did, Jack. Where did you learn to do what you do? Who taught you?"

"Don't know love. I can't remember me past. Well, I remember my life from a certain point, but the rest is a blur."

"Jack," I began carefully, "did it ever occur to you that you _are_ Springheeled Jack, the original one?"

He looked at me, delight dawning on his face. "You think so, love? But wouldn't I remember?"

"Maybe you died, Jack, and came back remembering nothing. I seem to recall the original Jack just vanishing one day."

Jack grinned hugely at me, as if all the pieces were clicking into place. "That would explain owning London, town, wouldn't it? Explains the memories I have too. Old Jack didn't always look like this, Valkyrie. Once upon a time, he was a right proper gentleman, and a handsome one too."

Jack's voice was changing, becoming richer, his accent disappearing as a rather clipped upper crust one took over. "I have to thank you, my dear, for reminding me of who I truly am. I was a gentleman, a rich man, and one of the highest members of magical society in London. But enough of that for now. I'll tell you of my downfall and curse, sometime later. Shall we be off then?"

Jack rose and offered me his hand. I took it in stunned silence, wondering what possible secrets his past could hold.

* * *

**Jack was cursed? Oh, what could have possibly happened? What type of man was Jack before he became a legend in folklore? I'm well aware Landy's gent is a different character, but my Jack isn't. Hope you liked it!**


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I don't own Springheeled-Jack, Valkyrie, Erskine, Tipstaff, Tanith. or Skulduggery. Iris is my OC though. Skulduggery was a bit out of character, but that will all make sense directly.

* * *

The next morning Jack, who had kept vigil all night greeted me warmly. He'd come down sometime in the morning through the window I'd left open for him, preparing breakfast for us both. I didn't know how he managed it with his nails being so long, but I was truly grateful. The Jack before me was no longer the Jack I'd known. He still had the same outwards appearance to a degree, but even that had changed. He'd been out earlier that day and managed to find some hair cream, slicking his unruly black hair back, and the effect was astounding.

The change in demeanor had softened his features as well. The lines were softer, and his eyes were no longer hard and ruthless. Even his carriage was relaxed and refined. I felt a pang of sorrow, missing the old Jack, for the man before me was neither wild nor free. But he smiled graciously as we sat with coffee in the living room. Jack savoured his coffee, then set his cup aside, regarding me thoughtfully. At long last he spoke. "You've been a good friend to me, Valkyrie Cain, so I am going to return the favour as a gentleman and an Englishman."

I opened my mouth to protest, but Jack held up a hand for silence before continuing. "You took me as your partner, willingly. You were a good friend to me despite what I'm sure is a rather frightening appearance, in fact I know I frighten you, though neither of us has a choice in the matter."

"Jack-"

"No, please do not lie to spare my feelings, Valkyrie. I frighten you because it was part of the curse put upon me. You literally cannot not fear me, and it is to your credit as both a woman and a warrior that you have treated me both as an equal and a gentleman worthy of your respect, and for that I thank you."

He reached up to touch the brim of his top hat, realizing belatedly that as a gentleman he had removed it inside. He gave me a brief self-deprecating smile before continuing. "You will notice I still have my nails, and I assure you it isn't from lack of trying to be free of them. But, alas, that was part of my curse as well. A curse I fully deserved because I let my foolish pride and being a gentleman get in the way of being with the woman I loved, just as Skulduggery has now."

"But Skulduggery doesn't love me, Jack. He told me as much himself."

"He lied to you, my dear. Just as I once lied to the woman I loved, sending her away rather than risk ruining both our reputations. Our story is remarkably similar to your own if you'd like to hear it. "

"But of course, Jack."

"Excellent. As you may already have surmised, I come from magical nobility, just as Skulduggery does. Family crests were not handed out 'just because' once upon a time, a rather worthy ancestor had to earn them in both our cases."

I nodded, prompting Jack to continue. He folded his hands on his crossed knees, seemed to consider his words before continuing. "You have heard of noblesse oblige, the obligation of nobility to show compassion towards the less fortunate? In keeping with that tradition my family would give aid in the form of money or food, or in extremely rare cases, house those who held magical promise on our estate, tutoring them."

"You can, of course, imagine the scandal this caused in certain rather spiteful and petty circles, but the men in my family were always beyond reproach. Always. So was I, once upon a time. You don't need to know her name, you only need know that I selected her from one of the poorest families in London to be my ward."

"She was around the age you were when Skulduggery took you as his own ward, and I was just as enchanted with her as he was with you. You simply cannot, by the way, imagine the guilt having to hide your relationship from your family has caused him. Skulduggery is every bit the gentleman, and the rumors of course started the moment he was spotted with you, people in certain circles being rather cruel gossips."

I put my own coffee down in surprise. "He never said a word."

"Nor would he. As a gentleman as your protector it was his duty to protect you from these things. It was my duty as well, and I did my duty, only too happy to bear the brunt of such reproach even though it wasn't deserved. I did of course have to best one gentleman in a magical duel, which was as illegal then as it is now, but his defeat silenced him and others. though albeit in his case it was forever." Jack smiled faintly at the memory, and I had to good sense not to say anything.

"I raised her, feeling the fond affection any mentor feels towards his student, just as Skulduggery in a sense raised you. As she got older I realized my feelings for her were changing, and that to act on them would go beyond the pale." He saw me stiffen, and apologized. "I do apologize, Valkyrie. That was a rather unfortunate turn of phrase to use in the presence of an Irishwoman, but I meant nothing by it. I wouldn't hurt you, my good and noble friend."

"Thank you kindly, Jack, and apology accepted. But I'm hardly nobility." I joked.

Jack caught my meaning and smiled. "You know precisely what I meant. She was clever and quick-witted as well, and along with her beauty and magical aptitude, it was a heady combination I couldn't bring myself to resist, though I never told her of my feelings. I regret that now."

"I still remember the day I sent her away. I'd been aware of her love for me for a while, but so long as neither of us spoke aloud of or acted upon our love all was well and it was acceptable for her to stay. You must realize that when she told me she loved me, it broke my heart in a thousand pieces. I felt it shatter, and it was only because I was a gentleman that I sent her away."

"I told her her feelings were unacceptable, having to watch her lovely face dissolve into tears. I mentioned our age differences, the fact that I had raised her as my ward. I was cruel to be kind as the expression goes, and I met her every objection, telling her she was a rather foolish child, as there was a great a gap between us as there is between you and Skulduggery."

"Lastly, I lied to her, and abominable thing to do, but to protect both her honour and reputation I did. I told her I was not in love with her, and she fled from me. It killed me to cause her so much pain, and perhaps your generation would not understand. But her honour meant everything to me, and marrying her would have made her an object of scorn."

"She would have been ignored in the social circles I dwelt in, and I'm fairly sure you know she would have been treated and regarded as a 'kept woman' at the best. Had I simply kept her, as would have been implied it would have been more acceptable, something my status as a noble gave me a right to in some eyes. I never agreed with that philosophy and I wouldn't dream of keeping any woman, let alone her. So I let her flee, never imagining she would have her revenge."

Jack fell silent, staring off into space, then blinked and return his attention to me. "My apologizes, Valkyrie. I haven't traveled through these memories in centuries. But the story needs telling, you need to hear this, just as Skulduggery did."

"You spoke with Skulduggery?"

"Indeed, though I will confess it took a while for me to convince him I am who I said I am. Old Jack had to start speaking like he used to, me." He said, slipping into his old way of speaking if only for an instant. "I had no idea how truly atrocious my grammar had become. Did I really used to speak of myself in the third person like that? Horrid."

"But yes, I indeed rang him early this morning, having recalled the rather worthy gentleman does not sleep. It took some convincing, because of course as a gentleman he had your reputation to protect. But when I shared my own story, pointing out how very good a gentlewoman you have been, and you are indeed one by habit if not by birth, he felt obligated to confess how he felt towards you. He loves you Valkyrie Cain, how very much you simply cannot imagine."

"Sending you away was all he could bring himself to do, and his unacceptable behaviour has been his only defense against calling you back to him. He adores you, and that adoration is slowly killing him, as mine brought a curse upon me."

"How could your love bring you a curse, Jack? You did the noble thing for your time."

"But not the right thing, Valkyrie. Sometimes a gentleman, if you will forgive the rather rude expression, should tell society and being a gentleman to go hang itself. She had gone to her grandmother for solace, a wise woman who knew ways of magic foreign to most sorcerors. The woman's heart was evil, so she tricked my would-be lover."

"She taught her a curse to place upon me, explaining I would be forever as I was, and that my lack of love would turn me into a monster of a man, the laughing stock of society. My beloved cursed me to my face, and only realized too late that she had been tricked."

"I became this mishappen creature you see before you. For it was not a lack of love, but my love the curse used to make me this way. I will be forever the age I was then, unable to die or ever fall ill. I will ever be frightening to women, repellent because the curse dooms me to be alone as I left her alone. Somehow you broke through part of that curse, Valkyrie. You found a way to love me as a friend and I can't begin to thank you enough."

Jack looked at me, and his face became soft, his voice gentle. "I know you would have become my lover in time if I asked, I could see it written on your face the moment I walked out dressed as I am now. But even as a mindless beast I respected Skulduggery's claim on you. Men have a silent communication, you see. Anyone seeing him with you knew he wasn't about to let anyone dispute that claim either, and the wrath of a man who cannot claim the woman he loves is a frightening thing to behold."

I didn't protest, what he said was perfectly true. I would have become his lover, even if he repelled me. Whether out of gratitude or sheer need to try and forget Skulduggery. Not that it would have worked, Skulduggery Pleasant was unforgettable. Even at that moment I wanted to be with him, and the thought must have showed in my face. "Ah, you see? You love him as well, you've always loved him as he has always loved you. It is the change in that love, to something romantic that Skulduggery couldn't face any more that I could. Very few things will drive a man to tears, but realizing he is in love with a woman he simply cannot have, that it would be unworthy of him as a gentleman to have, is one of them."

"He misses you, Valkyrie. He adores you. He confessed his love for you to me, and perhaps it is unworthy of a gentleman to meddle in such things, but meddle I shall. I've arranged for him to meet us later, Ghastly as well. I will keep Ghastly otherwise occupied. He knows of Skulduggery's adoration as well, and he warns me to tell you Skulduggery does not look well."

My heart sank, I wanted to go to Skulduggery at that very moment, but I was well aware he could flee, and most likely would if he suspected I knew of his love. Jack, duplicitous soul that he was, had arranged for Ghastly to drive, and our meeting place would be in public so Skulduggery had no chance to use magic to flee.

I smiled at Jack. "You have no idea what this means to me Jack, what it will mean to both of us. There is no way I can even begin to thank you, but if you ever need help in the future, ever, you only have to ask. But what about you, Jack? If you do this for me, you'll be alone again. That hardly seems fair."

"But we will always be friends, you and I, Valkyrie Cain. You needn't worry about me. I intend to see her out, to find out what's become of her. Most likely she is married with children by now, but I think not. Anytime I remembered that day, thinking it was only a dream she told me there would only ever be me. She fled out of guilt for what she'd done, and I seriously regret letting her go a second time. Therefore I will not allow Skulduggery to make the same mistake I did, nor should you."

"Skulduggery knows that I'm trapped in this hideous shell, just as he feels trapped within his bones. He feels hideous, at least when he even dares to think of being your lover and husband as well as your friend. But I assured him you love him and find him to be an extremely handsome gentleman as I know you do. I could see it in her face, you know? She still found me attractive, looking like this."

"Of course she did, Jack. She loves you. I hope you find her again."

Jack smiled and rose, offering me his hand and helping me to rise as well. "Perhaps I will Valkyrie, indeed, I am sure I shall. But for now, your destiny awaits. If you will do me the honour I shall escort you one last time, leaving you to him when I certain he has learned from my mistakes."

* * *

We met in Phoenix Park, finding Skulduggery and Ghastly at the base of one of the many monuments I could never recall the reason for, Skulduggery was sitting, and the sight of him caused my heart to lurch. Jack had warned me that Skulduggery could no longer bear the frame that gave him an illusion of mass, at the effect was terrible. His clothes hung on him, wrinkled, his tie askew. I realized he'd been carried there, because he couldn't rise to meet me, though I sensed he smiled bravely in greeting as Ghastly quietly stepped away with Jack.

Skulduggery's facade must have failed, because his old disguise covered him. He bowed his head, looking away from me, not daring to speak. I sat on the steps beside him, taking his gloved hand in mine. He felt so frail at that moment, that I wondered how he ever survived any battles. "How could I have been so blind, Skulduggery, not to see you suffering?"

"I'm a good liar, Valkyrie. Most men are. Jack has told you, then?"

"Yes, of course. He's your friend now, Skulduggery, mine too."

"He's a meddling friend is what his is. Still he brought you back to me, Valkyrie, and I'm profoundly thankful to him for that. I'm not worthy of you, I never shall be, but I'm not letting you go, not again. I'd hug you right now, but I'm afraid I'm rather unable to move very much at this point. Ghastly had to carry me here, and you can only imagine the looks _that_ drew."

I hugged Skulduggery gently and I realized he felt frailer. "Skulduggery-"

"I'll be all right, Valkyrie, now that you're here. I'm afraid I collapsed shortly after I saw the way Jack looked at you, and you at him. You're not in love with him, are you? You don't wish you were with him instead of me? He is a man of flesh and blood after all, such as he is."

"Skulduggery, that was rude. But no, I'm not in love with him, though it was a near thing, I suppose. Jack has someone who loves him if he can find her."

I felt Skulduggery smile behind the facade, and he tilted his head endearingly. "Would a kiss be too much to ask of you, Valkyrie Cain?" I smiled at him, kissing his deeply through the disguise. Skulduggery's response was feeble at first, then he wrapped his arms around me tightly, rising to his feet, drawing me up with him. When we at last parted I glared at him.

"Skulduggery Pleasant, you big liar! I thought you were dying!"

Skulduggery laughed, backing up the steps. "Now, now, my dearest combat accessory. The important thing to remember is that I did it for your own good."

Comprehension dawned on me at last. "You had Jack given to me as a partner, you knew all this would happen, didn't you? You planned it! This whole thing about new partners was your idea, wasn't it? You knew it could only end with me returning to you, you tricked me." I was growling, absolutely livid. Skulduggery laughed again, delighted.

"Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are when your angry? Because you are. Yes I planned it. Because if you came back to me, I could forget about being noble or being a gentleman."

"Who made up_ that_ rule?"

"I did, just now, and there's precious little you can do about it. You know when you grin like that I get the impression all is forgiven." He held out his arms and I went to him. Skulduggery held me to him tightly, and I knew this time he wouldn't let me go.

* * *

When the proscribed two weeks were up, we all walked into Erskine's office, minus Jack who had left us that morning, headed back to England to follow up some information Skulduggery had found for him. As impossible as it seemed the woman he loved had waited for him all those centuries. Erskine didn't look startled to see me with Skulduggery, and I knew from the smile on his face he'd been in on Skulduggery's plan. Only poor Tipstaff seemed confused as he fussed and fluttered, bringing more chairs and foisting tea on all of us, Skulduggery included, to his endless amusement.

Erskine grinned at me. "I heard you lost your new partner after one day, Valkyrie, tsk tsk. Of course he was in on the whole thing as well. Skulduggery having been working on your reunion from the moment he let you go. Jack remembering who he truly is was a happy side effect. But all's well that ends well, yes?"

"You're rotten men, all of you. Skulduggery could have just apologized."

Ghastly snorted. "With your temper? Lord, no. You had to be tricked into going back, made to think it was all your idea and poor Skulduggery was helpless. I'm sorry Valkyrie, but you know that is true. Besides, as a gentleman he was obliged to refuse you the first time. If you came back again, well now, there's only so much temptation even a gentleman is expected to stand." He drank his tea, grinning into the mug.

"You're horrid men, all of you." I said, unable to keep the smile off my face.

"No, we're Dead Men, Valkyrie." Skulduggery replied. "I only had to mention my plans and they were both willing to help. You're lucky they were since we tricked you for your own good."

"You aren't the first woman we've tricked either." Erskine said, grinning. "How did you think we convinced Tanith to come back to Ghastly after we got the Remnant out of her? The time he was gone on a mission for two weeks with Skulduggery? She thought he was on his death bed."

The men all snorted with laughter. "It worked like a charm, too." Ghastly wheezed. "She felt so guilty she agreed to marry me. Of course when she realized I was faking Skulduggery had to keep her from hitting me, but she calmed down and forgave me after a while." His smile was crooked, and I could only imagine how she showed her forgiveness.

Erskine, ever the gentleman, rescued me. "I also hear you've gotten engaged. That's a lovely ring, by that way. You two will have some time of course to enjoy your engagement."

"But we'll be bored." Skulduggery and I said at once.

Erskine shook his head in delight. "Very well then, I'll see what I can find you, but now if you'll all excuse me I need to bully Tipstaff into making me lunch."

* * *

Skulduggery and I were back in Phoenix Park to meet Jack two months later, and the change in the man was astonishing. His nails appeared normal, as did his eyes and teeth. Indeed everything about the curse was gone.

There was a woman on his arm and I knew without a doubt it was the woman he'd let go. She was a raven-haired beauty in a black and purple Victorian style dress that suited her perfectly, and although she smiled at us in greeting she only had eyes for Jack. He too was looking at he in unabashed adoration, and I could see the wedding rings they both wore. At that moment I was profoundly grateful to Jack for being enough of a gentleman even as he used to be to spare us both a dreadful mistake. He would have never found her again, and the thought made me blink rather rapidly.

Skulduggery grinned, his facade matching the effect. "Congratulations are in order all around, Jack. Again I thank you for helping me with Valkyrie."

The men fell into conversation, and the woman smiled at me, inviting me to walk with her. "You are Valkyrie, yes? My name is Iris now, Jack and I both changed our names and we've started a new life together. I can't begin to thank you enough for returning him to me, Valkyrie. Your love as a friend broke part of the curse, because no woman was ever supposed to be able to love him, even as a friend. My grandmother was that cruel. God."

"It isn't your fault, you know. It was all I could do not to hurt Skulduggery when he refused me. That frightened me so bad I ran away from him, more than listening to him send me away. I was terrified I'd hurt him because I knew I wanted to out of pure spite."

"But you didn't." She said gently.

"No, but only because I was afraid I'd kill him. If I'd had a magical mother the man would be wearing horns and a tail right now, he would."

We both laughed, and chatted amiably until we returned to the men. Jack took his wife's arm and led her away, and when Skulduggery offered his arm I took it. "That will be us you know, as soon as we're married. But with more guns and punching people in the face of course." He murmured.

"Of course. Speaking of punching people in the face, we do have a case to get back to, you know."

"True, true, but not for today. Today I want to be able to walk with you through the park like any other man would. Feeling the sun on my face, well my facade at any rate."

"I'd love that, Skulduggery, you know I would."

Skulduggery grinned at me, overdoing the expression as he always did and I smiled in return. It would be a walk consisting of him frightening people by over doing it on the social front, but that was part of Skulduggery's charm.

When we at last returned to the car he slipped his disguise back on ready for the long drive back home. "Seatbelt. You know, Valkyrie, there are rings in the glove compartment, and I know how you hate a fuss. I don't suppose a quick stop for a marriage license on the way home would appeal to you, would it?"

"We have an appointment, don't we?"

"Indeed we do. Everything is already taken care of, we only have to show up, providing you want to, that is."

"Of course I do, Skulduggery. Nothing would make me happier." I could feel his grin behind the facade as he leaned over to kiss me. Skulduggery put the Bentley into drive at last, and we headed off to meet our preordained destiny.

* * *

The next morning I was cuddled up to Skulduggery, enjoying how his bones absorbed and radiated back the warmth from my body. He had and easy arm looped around me and neither one of us was in any hurry to move.

"Skulduggery?"

"Mmm?"

"How did Jack manage to break the rest of the curse?"

"Ah, that. Wedding night."

"You're kidding me."

"No, I'm not. Some curses work that way, provided you are with the one who truly loves you. You will note of course I have turned into anything rather handsome."

"You're already handsome. Stop fishing for compliments, Skulduggery." I said, kissing his bony cheek softly. He chuckled, then nuzzled into me.

"Some honeymoon this is going to be. Three crime scenes to visit and an hours long drive ahead of us. I meant to take you somewhere romantic, you know."

"You couldn't stand romantic, and neither could I, Skulduggery. Besides, look at it this way, we get an all-expense-paid road trip out of it. Plus three exotic locales without the annoying umbrella drinks or drunken tourists in loud shirts."

"That's my girl." He grinned, chucking me under the chin. "Well get dressed, Mrs. Pleasant, and we'll be off. Your wedding present is in it's holster in your jacket by the way."

"Skulduggery? You got me a firearm at last?"

"Indeed, your a married woman now and will need to defend your honour. I don't suppose you got me anything?" He asked hopefully as we both dressed.

"There's something in the glove compartment of the Bentley. I got it when I stopped at Gordon's house for my overnight bag. The letter C and the number 4 are involved, but that's all I'm saying."

"What a thoughtful gift, Valkyrie! I think it will come in handy on this case. Ready? Then let's be off, I'll get you breakfast on the way."

The C-4 did indeed come in handy on that case, as did the firearm, but that is another story for another time.

* * *

**I so did not expect the story to twist the way it did. Listened to Eddie Money's 'Walk on Water' with a dash of his 'Two Tickets to Paradise' whilst I wrote. OK a double shot if 'Amie' by Pure Prairie League as well. Also 'Blame it on the Boogie' by the Jackson Five during editing. I had to consult the US Embassy website for information on marriage procedures in the Republic of Ireland, and if you have ever dealt with an Embassy you know what an unparalleled delight that was.**


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